You busy in your world, everything is looking perfect. All of a sudden you start to feel down. You start to feel like everything is your fault. You feel hurt. Just hurt. If I had to point fingers as to why am I feeling the way I am I probably have an “excuse”. That’s the thing I have an excuse as to why I’m feeling the way I am.
Maybe it’s just the fact that my life is so repetitive; everyday is the same. I blame the system for it. We are nurtured the way to think a certain way. And I feel like that’s my problem. If I’m not working certain hours, not taking certain credits in school, not having a job after I graduate that will pay me over 70k a year I will feel like I have failed. Have I though? Why do you feel down if we do what we are suppose to do for no reason? We look for excuses and we point fingers when we feel down.
How can I change the way I feel
I can’t, nobody can’t; because that’s the way we have been wired all our lives to do “things the right way” . Anything that you do differently is wrong or labeled as “weird” right away. People have expectations from you as soon as you start your first grade. Some want you to become a doctor, some want you to become an engineer etc. anything besides that is a “waste of time” . That’s how I feel. I’m wasting my time. But am I wasting my time? No, I’m doing fairly well for myself.
People want you to be successful in life. People want you to be the greatest individual out there. Everyone wants straight As in your family and you’re so into proving them right that you breakdown and hide it from them. We start to tell people we are fine, school is good, everything is good, everything is perfect how it is suppose to be. It’s not. We don’t live our lives that we want to live, we end up living lives of people who failed at living their lives and they point fingers at you so here we are trying to prove ourselfs.